Tuesday, October 4, 2022

Do you know how many time zones there are in the Soviet Union? Eleven. It's not even funny.





When my friend Ian died words poured out and my sadness was so severe. To say devastated might be a stretch, but I was broken. With my friend Mike's passing. I saw it coming. He had health issues that were obvious to me were not going to get better. I am totally sad, don't get me wrong, I am a different kind of sad.
He always chose his words carefully, so I am going to try and do the same. 

 Tumbleweed. Kerosene. Hairbeard. Jesse Tierra.

Heading out to an evening on a wedding cruise, my mom - "You don't need a coat?"

M- "When you look this good, you don't get cold."

Asking for a check at a restaurant, "Flog her dress and give her an egg."

Talking about music, "You know Johnny Cochran's song, don't step on my blue suede---cat."

After seeing the Residents, "The Residents get me."

Eating pizza at 10am being (a little) hungover watching 9 episodes of Law and Order in a row.

 M and my husband building/putting together shelves and tables. Moving furniture when I had crazy eyes.

Dead shows.

Riding around in the E Ticket.

Picking him up from school in my maroon 1977 Toyota Celica, blasting "Nellie the Elephant," and eating at Naugles/Del Taco.

Making sure he didn't oversleep and miss my wedding, for which he was a groomsman.

Packing up his apartment in San Diego and arguing with another friend about not throwing away an old wooden spoon. 

M calling me on the phone telling me he would be coming to San Francisco to visit in a day or two and showing up 2 weeks later.

Mike telling me he was in love.

Long talks at the kitchen table.

Many Halloweens.

These are just a few snippets of the past 35 years of friendship with my chosen brother, Mike. 

My friend Mike was not an easy person. The complexities of his world view, always thinking he had one last card to play, and his unwillingness to get "it" wrong made for some personal and professional challenges. He didn't want  people to see him vulnerable and did not like to ask for assistance. His cowboy-ness was incredibly charming and frustrating in the same breath. His scientific mind made him weird in the best possible way and also often prevented him from appreciating nuance and shooting from the hip. He could always make me laugh and never fed me a fake I am busy line to help me with a project. 

I miss you -chosen brother. 

I have been listening to Negativland a lot. So I will end this transmission.

Because man, nobody is perfect. 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Word